Grandma Ruthie

My grandmother passed away last week. The week has been hard. Being with family made it easier... and having things to accomplish... like cleaning up the apartment and car... going through pictures... eating (a lot). Back in Topeka, it is harder. I have to work, cook, clean... all I really want to do is cry.

This was my contribution to the service:

It was a joy to have Ruth Kivett as a grandmother. She showered us with love in the form of hugs, kisses, leg pats, trips to the dollar store, delicious food, candy, and generous monetary gifts that got many of us through college and other tough times. She offered up her home for meals and sleep but also for so many hours of fun......the swing set, hide and seek, dance contests, pinball wars, plays and haunted houses, press cookies and sprinkles, big wheels, and unforgettable "secret passages." As we have grown to adults she has continued to be a huge part of our life. She has met boyfriends and girlfriends, attended weddings, met great grandchildren as tiny babies, heard about careers and all the ways our lifes change from day to day. She was the phone call you wanted to make on a commute home and the person I always wanted to share news of my latest cooking accomplishment with. Her faith was passed down in many ways, perhaps not the most concrete ones, but it is there in the mazzuzahs on our doors and the matza ball soup we all crave. We wanted to hear about how many quarters she had won or lost at card games in the days or weeks between visits. The calls that rolled in from Tunie and an endless stream of other friends always reminded us that friendships are made to last. Her door at the village was never closed and friends, family, and staff always knew that Grandma Ruthie would have an ear to listen and a candy bar to share. She will be greatly missed... and I hope that wherever she is now, she has many familiar soles to visit with and that the soup is hot!

My cousin Simone wrote up a sheet of memories... this is it:


Ruth, Ruthie, Winch, Grandma

When I think of Ruthie, also known as Grandma or Winch, I think of someone who was an incredible listener.

A friend, a mother, a grandmother, a great grandmother, a mentor, and a person to play cards with.

So many memories flash through my mind – sitting in the breakfast room table watching the Price is Right drinking a Diet Rite and cutting up ingredients for her famous Tuna Salad.

Grandma’s homemade bread, the frozen Thin Mint cookies in the freezer along with a variety of other frozen items.

You would never be hungry at 6801 Locust. The kitchen was always bustling with something yummy to eat.

Friday night dinners – these were always a fun time. All the guests would arrive early and stay late.

I remember Saturday mornings I spent in Ruthie’s bedroom with the other cousins watching TV while Grandma slowly got ready. She liked to go to bed late and wake up late.

She was an avid Chiefs fan and loved to watch the Royals. I remember the matzo ball soup, the burnt and crispy homemade chocolate chip cookies, the See’s candy box, and the never ending candy dish.

It was always fun to visit her house, since I did not grow up having cable TV. I was excited to watch Nickelodeon, Showtime, and MTV.

I recall those famous and exciting trips to McDonald’s and Winsteads. Bannister Mall and Ward Parkway.

We used to eat Nuway Burger and she loved Cashew Chicken at the Princess Garden.

And don’t forget the soup better be boiling hot and or it needed to be re-heated.
The toaster oven, the famous black pepper shaker…


Thanksgiving and Passover were always fun events as well. Grandma made sweet potatoes with sugar and marsh mellows. A family favorite! Don’t forget brownies and rugalah.

Grandma liked her card playing with her friends and enjoyed window shopping. Another memory was how she would shop at numerous grocery stores just to get the different specials.

I have fond memories of the numerous spring and summer vacations I spent in Kansas City.

On my last visit with her in August 2009, I remember sitting outside with my sister Valerie on the rocking chairs outside Village Shalom enjoying the beautiful sunshine. We talked about all kinds of subjects. It was a peaceful time.

We always talked about what meals we ate and if they were good.

Grandma will always be Grandma, and will always be in my heart as an amazing grandmother. I love you.

By: Simone Kivett
September 2, 2009